Excellent Creations Born From Boredom

Sometimes I have days where although I have no motivation for genuine real life things, I am overcome by motivation to create my way out of boredom. Accordingly, here is a photo list of some nice things which I have made over the last few weeks, for your delight and delectation. Requests welcome!



This is a tasty yet over-large battenburg cake I made at my Uncle's behest. It was EXTREMELY nice. I think if I ever entered a cake competition I would enter one of these, though I would perhaps learn how to cover it properly first!



By the mystic regulation of our dark association, ere you open conversation with another kindred soul - you must learn to make sausage rolls and they must be delicious and your brother must eat them all.



These cakes were made because I really needed to play with the exciting icing gun thing that Mother Oliver has stored away. I then took them to our Tuesday night pub haunt and they inspired our quiz name, The Cake Faces! (This mainly hilarious because Quiz Man's broad Geordie accent pronounces it hilariously. Excellent.)



This is a lamp, originally from Asda during Uni years, which myself and Ashley fruitlessly tried to shift at several car boot sales, which I then eventually grew tired of seeing so I covered it in exciting things to make it suitable for my new room at new Uni. Now, give three cheers!



I love bunting. It represents everything quaint and British about the world. So yesterday I finished making some, with scraps from all parts of life - some of Buttercup's apron, some white cord from sailor collars, some old bed sheet, some from Ashley's attic. I find the overall effect rather delicious.



Now, while it is true that I didn't make this one, I did order it from Sunday Girl Accessories, who DID make it, and I love it, therefore it is worthy of a picture.


I leave you now to embark on 'Craft Day' with dear Miss Bell, so no doubt I shall return later with yet more exciting creations!

It's Never Dull in 'Ull

Dear Everyone,

It is now time to share with the world an exciting photographic tour of Hull, the places I often was, and how they look now. Interestingly, large parts of Hull simply look the same. Yes, you're right, that actually isn't very interesting. Either way, here is a little tour for you. Some of the photo evidence for the tour might be a little blurry; this is basically because it was a car-tour on the most part, courtesy of Oliver the Younger.

FIRST YEAR HOME
Arriving, fresh faced and eager, at University at the tender age of 18, I was naturally excited to be living away from home for the first time. Some students are nervous about this sort of thing, but 'The Lawns' complex assuaged this; filled with over a thousand noisy dirty drunken youths, it was not dissimilar to a student-orientated-supermarket-own-brand-Butlins. I couldn't take a picture of my old room, as people live there and that would have involved getting out of the car and walking around, but here is what someone else's room looked like, which, coincidentally, is exactly the same as mine:


And here is the sign for the set of Halls I lived in - there were seven 'Halls' on the Lawns, and each had 5 blocks and some bungalows within. There were usually 24 in a block, in open plan floors of 8 rooms to a floor, which meant 4 rooms per bathroom. Obviously, we in ‘E-Block’ of ‘Downs Hall’ were the coolest, but naturally attracted some odd ridicule at the naming of the Halls…


The Lawns was immense; it had it’s own bar, its own bus stop, and it’s own…er…football space. What more could you possibly want? Amusingly, the bus frequently got stuck in some rubble from the Driver trying to be clever and making the turning circle too small, so in later years (once we had moved out, so it was ok) our lovely bus shelter was removed, and the bus stop itself moved so the Drivers would cause less mayhem. On a side note, we needed that bus because The Lawns, though wonderful, was a good 15 minutes ride away from Campus. Or a 55 minute fast walk, WILLIAM. I shall hold that against you for the rest of my life!! Ahem. Here is the new Bus Stop, right next to the giant tree stump which used to be a tree:


And here is the Lawn’s Bar, from the outside. An intriguing place, full of ‘Snakey B’ (which is Diesel to any self respecting northerner), Ring of Fire, Apple Corky’s and dodgy juke box tunes. Well, in our day it was. I am told that since then they have kitted it out with not only widescreen TVs, but also a music collection which goes PAST the year 2000. Impressive. I wonder how many beer mats, glasses and bar runners (Miss Stretton…) we actually stole from in here.


This is a picture of some general ‘space’ in The Lawns. As you can possibly tell it was listed buildings surrounded by open grassy space; many adventures occurred on this grass, including ‘The Mud Football Incident’ and ‘That Time After The Rum When Kayleigh Wanted To Play In The Mud And Had To Be Restrained’. Mainly mud based stories, now I come to think on it.



So that was where I lived in first year. I will dig out interior shots to match all of these at some point in life!

SECOND YEAR HOME
In Second Year I lived in 151 DeGrey Street, with 5 or 6 other people (depending what day it was), including the lovely Mannymoo. This was very conveniently one second away from the student central shopping area of Newland Ave, but inconveniently further than you would think to the University. Having now sampled the walk some of my Newcastle Uni friends made daily, I probably should not complain, but being 20 minutes away from Campus in Hull was quite far! Here is a picture of the house, my room was amazing – I have always wanted an attic room with eaves, look at it there (the white one, mid picture), all velux window and everything!!

They even still have up the little felt-tipped sign I blue-tacked to the door before my Birthday Party in 2007!

Not much else to write about second year home. Houses in Second and Third Year were rather less exciting than the hive of Fresher-excitement which was the Lawns!

THIRD YEAR HOME
In Third Year I downsized to live with Jim and Tom in 48 Raglan Street. When we lived there, it was a three bed roomed wee house with Chinese neighbours who Jim loaned things to occasionally and who hung their knickers on coat hangers to dry, and with a mad European Old Cat Lady living down the road, and with a big empty space. We never found out why the space was there but it had clearly been there a long time; we suspected bombing in the war, but that was probably a little long ago. Anyway, shock horror, on my little tour, I discovered that someone has photo-shopped a brand new house in this street of old mingy houses!!! You can see it there. Pretending to be a real house. Anyway, my room in this one was the Upstairs, left AND right windows – was another amazing room, with a separate bed-room to stuff-room. Only down side was the fact that the wall between mine and Tom’s room was pretty much just wallpaper, without wall. Intrusive perhaps? Or cosy…


PLACES

This is turning into a bit of an epic post. I thought it might. But as Bette pointed out, Matt only ever looks at pictures, Simon only reads if his name is here (which, as I don’t know how to do that, it won’t be), and Steven may be uninterested as it isn’t G&S related. I’m sure SOME people are still reading!

Anyway, places I liked. I would have taken a picture of my favourite coffee shop in the world, Planet Coffee, but myself and Rory went there, sat outside and had a lovely drink, and then stole the cup. So I felt too anxious about being caught to hang around long! Plus it wasn’t as nice after they put furniture in the upstairs room and removed the carpet/beanbag area. I also took a couple of pictures of night clubs which I used to very much enjoy back in my 5-nights-a-week-drunk phase, but in the cold hard light of day these just weren’t impressive enough to make the cut. However, here are a few other places I liked…

The Old Grey Mare, famous for exceptionally cheap food and 6 shots for £5, just behind the first year bus stop, right opposite my building, perfect for taking your family to when you force them to come and see you in some sort of opera:


The Middleton Hall, famous for being the place where HUGSS used to stage their shows. Being on University property you would think that would make it cheaper to hire, but you would be wrong, however we always managed a fairly good storage-and-building system with them, and Bob The Sound And Lights Man was…well, he was there usually! The stage can be seen in other posts which showcase my G&S life, but this is the outside. There was also an Art Gallery in there which I believe I was once forced to go to as part of a seminar of some form.


The Larkin Building, famous for being where Kayleigh most often attended seminars. Sometimes Lectures. Though let’s face it, lectures weren’t compulsory. Also the home of the music department and rehearsal rooms. Unreliable lift; once witnessed the entire Pinafore cast (minus myself and one other sensible person traversing the stairs) get stuck in said lift. Hilarious.


The Library, famous for books. And amazing views of Hull from the windows. For anyone who doesn’t know, Hull is flat. Completely flat, everywhere you go, there are simply no hills or banks. This meant the prime topic of conversation on Open Days was if potential students had witnessed the view, which often they had, but not with the notion that they would spend a good 70% or more of their Library time gazing on it. The English Floor was Level 5, but in Third Year the ‘staring out of windows’ situation got so bad that I officially resigned any chance of getting a laptop-socket on 5th, and moved down to the little known first floor reference section. No windows there! Which is probably the only reason I salvaged my 2:1. Hilarious times in the library include one time when William got into a lift and abandoned me, and the million times fire alarms happened and everyone had to abandon everything and traipse down aaaaalll those stairs. Interestingly, there were two toilets per floor, on separate sides of the library – but only ever men’s OR women’s. Never both. The Library, ladies and gentlemen:



The Union. A place of happy times and happy things:


On the inside, the Union has pretty much completely changed since my first year. I remember arriving and having to negotiate my way through stupid amounts of corridors that led nowhere and stairs that missed a floor, and then some genius decided that what Hull Students REALLY need is a big glass staircase on the outside with a colour changing light in the top. Which didn’t take you anywhere that stairs didn’t previously go. But meant they had to re-build the entire Union insides. Which, in turn, meant that the rehearsal rooms were no longer allowed to be used for singing (although in two years we never got told off once). The Union enclosed the Hullfire (Student Magazine) Office, where I think I spend some of my time as Arts Editor…at least once or twice…a shop (complete with pick-n-mix stand), a smoothie bar, a Waterstones, several cafes, the Sanctuary Bar (best place ever, complete with outside decking area), the Johnny Mac Bar (home of HUGSS Variety Shows and Wednesday Night AU Carnage) and Asylum, the Hull Student’s on site night club. Too many good times to list. They’ve since moved the shop into the café, moved some chairs into the shop and forced the smoothie bar into an old office, but it still feels the same! Here is Sanc, from the outside, in the distance under some trees…


Thwaite Hall. I never went here (another version of The Lawns but for people with lots of money) but more often than not it would make me chuckle driving past the sign for it when some smart alec had removed letters, so that the sign read “T w a t Hall”. Never fails to amuse.


Phone Boxes. There was an exciting adventure once where we got 8 people into a phone box AND shut the door. Good times. All the phones in Hull belong to Kingston Communications, so they dictate that all phone boxes are white, so here is an example for you:


The Royal Quays Shopping Centre: Only Hull would have a shopping centre built on some strange man made lake. Occasionally there were ducks or fountains here. Occasionally students fell in, as this is in Hull Town Centre, opposite popular night clubs. Always, there was murky nasty water.


And to finish off, this is a nice blurry picture of the house that one day, I will live in. Apart from the fact that it is on a main road into Student-ville, it looks like it fell out of Jane Austen. Good times.


Ladies and Gentlemen, I ask you to please thank our driver for today:


And I leave you with the suggestion that, should you ever visit Hull – take someone with you who knows how to show you the nice bits. They will probably just take you to Beverley, which is a nice little village next door, but you might drive through Hull on the way!
I miss Hull.

WS Gilbert: Memories and Connections!

In trawling people’s status updates last week to enjoy the ‘WS Gilbert World Status Day’ madness, it occurred to me that a good few of the G&S lines are marred, marked, starred, scarred, blemished or otherwise tarnished by experiences I have had of them. I don’t at all mean this in the negative way, merely that I can no longer hear the line in one context without referencing it in another, making a direct and often surprisingly strong connection to a memory. I’m pretty sure this must be something common to everyone who performs, though feel free to contradict me. I have compiled a list for your enjoyment of the overriding memories coming from many of the world’s favourite Gilbert quotes. Happy times!


Ruddigore
“I am the spectre of the late Sir Roderick Murgatroyd...”
Steven (alias Sir Roderick) answering his shoe phone hilariously with an interpretation of the above – also Rory’s exaggerated creepy walking in time to the music

“What is it, have you carried her off?”
Steven delivering his line in the dark because the lights just didn’t come on. Kayleigh unable to keep a straight face.

“I get my crime over with first thing in the morning”
Richard’s bizarre and amusing ‘Transylvanian’ or Sesame Street’s ‘The Count’ accent

“…Step down from their frames..”
Laura W forgetting her line and merely repeating ‘from their frames’ several times until she remembered it

“Roddy Doddy!”
THAT Scottish accent.

“Belay? Certainly not.”
Sebastion, full of smooth moves, getting a kiss from his Rose Maybud

Iolanthe
“Distinctly. I have always kept my duty strictly before my eyes and it is to this fact that I owe my advancement to my current distinguished position.”
This conversation between the Lord Chancellor and Strephon, in the HUGSS version, included a rather precarious pair of short shorts, and Ryan’s crotch uncomfortably close to Alex’ face; possibly one of the most hilarious things I’ve ever seen.

“Dignified and Stately! Stignified and Dately? ”
Double D, stumbling forward, drunk!

“Never, Oh Never, A one for me!”
Can't hear this without remembering Liam’s insertion of three words (“GAME! SET! MATCH!”) over the chords following the line.

“Tis I, Young Strephon!”
Memories of Alex, on the last night, milking his exceptionally long “I” for all it was worth!

“Away we go to Fairy Land!”
Never complete without Dee’s little voice saying ‘Fairyland?! Great!’ a la HUGSS 2008

Mikado
“Every cloud has a silver lining”
Seanny, in a move of surprising ironic humour, pointing his silver tunic lining out to the unsuspecting audiences

“Abroad? His address!” followed by… “To Italy!” “To Italy?!?” “…to Whitley Bay”
Paul, enjoying Keith or Peter’s hilarious local reference

Pinafore
“I attach but little value to rank or wealth”
Aidan, getting his ‘w’ and ‘r’ mixed up…!

“Three loving pairs on the same day united!”
Elizabeth’s attention seeking Phoebe

“Farewell, my own, light of my life, farewell!”
I will never hear this again without laughing at poor Kate trying to find the button on the keyboard which turns off the accidental ‘Drum and Bass’ rhythm!

“Go, ribald, get you hence, to your cabin with celerity!”
Liam replacing ‘cabin’ with ‘cabbage’ and ‘celerity’ with ‘celery’

Grand Duke
“But darling, what do you expect for eighteen pence a day?”
Two on this one; Elizabeth’s Russian Daaahrlink, and Richard’s rehearsal-version Gay New Yorker!

“I was thinking of embracing you, my sugar plum!”
Matthew, in several conversations pre-dating the performance, trying to make the Sugar Plum sound as creepy as possible

“Oh no he’s not!/ Oh no HEEEE’S not!”
Matthew again, a penchant for hilarious donkey noises which spurred on uncontrollable laughter. Alo, not attached to a line, but just after this, the 'RRRRUUUFFF' noise in the dance :)

“His beautiful daughter”
Aidan and Jamie manning the Greek Men volume front in absence of all others!

Yeomen
“Oh thoughtless crew, ye know not what ye do…”
Liam being horrifically murdered in Peak Opera’s Yeomen; surprisingly emotional!

Ida
“We rather think he dares but never never mind!”
Brian, leering over soldier’s shoulders as the peppery Hildebrand

The Gondoliers
“Old Xeres we’ll drink, Manzanilla, Monterro”
Laura and Laura, with ‘Old Dog Head we’ll drink’…

“A plate of macaroni and a rusk?”
Jonathan’s infectious laughing fit at revealing SavoyNet’s intriguing pasta dish creation

“Then away we go to an Island fair, that lies on a Southern Sea”
The incredible sadness which I actually felt for touching silhouetted wives left behind in Venice while the Gondoliers sailed away; the most empathy I have ever suffered for a character or scene

Pirates
“On his mother;” “ON HIS MOTHER?!?!”
Ryan and Rory in the hilarious and unique Geordie Policemen Duet

“A policemen’s lot is not a happy one – happy one.”
Will never be complete again without a yawn and an ‘I hate you!’ at the end, a-la Rory and Ryan

“We charge you yield, in Queen Victoria’s name”
Jon, enjoying Ryan’s brain child, the horrendously posh sounding well-placed ‘Bugger.’



I’m absolutely positive that there are many more G&S lines than this which have mental notes permanently attached to them, but they escape me at the present. One day I shall endeavour to complete the list! I’d love to hear other people’s marked lines one day too :)

A Letter to John Rutter

Dear John,

I am writing to tell you that I am not at all impressed with the fact that, yet again, I am being forced to endure your music in my rehearsals. Now, I know I can’t write music and therefore should not really ‘throw stones’, but I really do think you could have done better with your compositions. 0/10. “Must try MUCH harder”.

Until recently I did not particularly object to your music, having been (through choice, I may add) blissfully unaware of most of it, but events change and I am now being exposed, on a weekly basis, to the absolute disgusting drivel that is ‘Let’s Begin Again’. In all honesty, John, it would have been much better for all of us if you had never started, let alone beginning again. Sitting quietly in the front row and maintaining composure throughout the horrific drone which is your dreadfully unimaginative alto line is nothing short of abject torture. Not to mention the fact that my gender-confused cat writes better lyrics than yours on the wall of her litter tray.

Please accept this letter as a declaration of the abhorrence and repulsion I now feel whenever your name is mentioned. Please also note, Dearest John, that I shall be singing flat, sharp, and incredibly wrong (often at the same time!) until you repent this outrage and issue a decree banning all amateur groups from inflicting your miserable harmonies on their unsuspecting members.

Kindest Regards,

Kayleigh

My Weekend In Pictures

I like pictures. Here are some for you to enjoy!

Friday
Driving home from work, this hilarious and delightfully titled van was in front of me:

Later, at Ashley’s house, enjoyed a delicious fry-up and tasty home made biscuit treat, and we (Mr Martin, Miss Bell and myself) indulged in lots of ‘stuff viewing’ and I defaced the family chalk board:

Saturday
I indulged in some enjoyable nothingness, and then accompanied the lovely Matthew shopping, with dearest Bette. No pictures of this, which is a shame, some of those jeans were rather amusing. Later, enjoyed the amusing spectacle of Matt and Bette trying to ‘de-anti-fraud-pin’ an old VCR player (see below). Comments included “Does this white thing attach to that white thing?” , “I’ve done something clever, look – OW!” and my personal favourite “Goodness me, look at this! It’s the – oh sh*t, I broke it.” It looked a bit like this:

I then enjoyed some random Wii-carnage, filling up the memory space with some more Wii characters. Ten points if anyone can guess who they are…

Sunday
Wedding Craft Day – Miss Bell, Miss Lavelle-soon-to-be-Strongman and myself were creating Wedding Invitations, under the strict instructions of Bridezilla, who can’t abide too much white around a red piece of card it turns out. We had some nice lasagne, some carrot cake, lots of tea, and encountered the most ridiculous glue-mouse-system ever to be invented:

Monday
Having had the day off work, decided to lounge around in pyjamas for a while and generally relax – until at least 9:30am. Following this, examined presents from parents all the way from Oz Land – this is my lovely new dressing gown, picture specially for Bette who I think will appreciate it:

And that’s about it! Got some good bargains on Pinafore props too, but posting pictures of them would spoil the surprise!

More exciting picture diary instalments to come, I am sure…!

Adventure Number One - check!

This morning saw the commencement and completion of self-posed Adventure Number One - to explore the fields around the Business School. Now in retrospect, I probably should have chosen a slightly less windy day, because the declaration to go out exploring resulted in genuine concern from work-fellows about my sanity. However, deciding it would blow some of the detritus out of my poor brain, off I went. For your delight and delectation, here is a nice picture of the view that I found:


It looks like a generic picture I may have stolen but the bad quality proves it was from my phone camera! And here is a nice picture of the shed that I work in. Yes, that's right, everyone calls those The Sheds. Come to Durham Business School! Spend £30,000 on an MBA! Have it administered by some distracted women living in sheds!


Adventure Number One was at best moderately satisfactory. Here's hoping for more excitement from further adventurous instalments...

Tales From Liz And Lil - Episode 1, Walking The Cat

Friday night seems to be the night where Liz and Lil's House of Fun winds down a little and we end up sat vacantly with nothing to do. This brings on ridiculous moods like The Time With The Chocolate Santa and The Time This Girl Wrote Something On Facebook About You But It Was Actually Me. Last Friday, as a novel idea, we went for an Adventure, and took the cat (our female cat, called Reginald) for a walk!
Here is me with the unsuspecting victim…



..and here is Reggie trying to explore in the bushes…I say trying because This One Time Laura Saw A Rat Running Across The Door and I wouldn’t want Reg to come up against a Sunderland rat. It might batter her to death with it’s shiny white trainers. Anyway, proof of the lovely red leader in action…



…and ten minutes later we were bored and came back in. Now I realise it looks like the cat absolutely hates me and is shooting lazers somewhere (not unlike many famous Lol-Catz) but I think she just resented having her picture taken because it was stealing half of her soul, and she can’t work in those conditions!



Tune in tomorrow for more exciting Tales From Liz And Lil!

My Lord, Grand Duke, Farewell...

Monday mornings should be made illegal; I think if enough people were to lobby the government to extend the weekend even just to Monday Lunch time, thus affording a well-needed lie in to start the week, life would be a much happier place. I also think we should be actively campaigning for everyone involved in amateur dramatics to have at least one week free holiday to spend recovering – perhaps realistically we would never win that one, but imagine how amazing it would be if we did…it would certainly be easier to get men involved with Gilbert and Sullivan then…

As is to be expected, severe post-show blues are tramping around all over my life today, wearing stiletto-heeled welly boots covered in mud. If anyone had suggestions about how to combat these uninvited pests, that would be great; currently I am sat, still wearing my outdoor coat and scarf (two hours into the working day) staring blankly at the computer. I am not going to lie to you, this recovery tactic does not seem to be working. Perhaps if I had an interesting job, throwing myself into menial daily tasks might help a little, but this is more of a muscle-memory-monkey job and so affords one’s brain far too much wandering time.

It’s hard to explain post-show blues to people who don’t partake in the am-dram world. I think the best I have managed so far is the striking similarity to the vacuum created in life when you break off some sort of romance; something which monopolises your thoughts and creative energy so much that when you remove it, the gaping hole takes a good long while to fill up, and you can’t motivate yourself to proactively try and fill it. It seems unhealthy to actively encourage this sort of feeling, and apparently it was certainly unwise to throw one’s self into two shows in one month; being careless with one’s own emotional stability and stage/life boundaries in such a way should, in future, be avoided. Although to draw on the positive side, to be lucky enough to perform twice in such a short period was an amazing experience.

(Several hours later..)
It is inherently easier to live once Monday morning is over. That is definitely true. Although, I am still sat with my outdoor coat on.

For anyone interested, The Grand Duke was a success. Audience reactions were positive, cast slip-ups were few and it seems everyone enjoyed themselves! Now, onwards and upwards…

Come, walk up and purchase with avidity!

Once more inspired by perusing other blogs, it occurs to me that I would like to actively promote NUGSS performance of Gilbert and Sullivan's "The Grand Duke" - come one come all!

Here is me actively promoting the show in my office at work:



The Grand Duke is one of the least popular Gilbert and Sullivan Operas, though to be quite honest after prolonged exposure to it through rehearsals for the last six months, I don't quite know why it should be so! It is true that many of the tunes lack the memorable punch of shows like Pirates or Pinafore, but they also contain some of the more enjoyable harmonies (and most difficult alto lines)in the whole cannon - not to mention two great dance numbers. It seems Gilbert was experiencing a satirical peak with the sheer amount of industries and themes he takes on within the plot, and the marriage of character to music is incredibly aptly executed. There is a good amount for the chorus to enjoy, and some of the lead female characters challenge the usual boundaries of their set (ie. Lisa, Julia, The Baroness)to an extent which proves a refreshing change for the actresses involved.

This particular production benefits from the entire cast being made up of students; Gilbert and Sullivan can too often suffer from a largely aging cast - here, as in many University productions - from the sublime to the ridiculous, the oldest member of the cast of The Grand Duke is merely 25. Though this has its inconveniences (in lines which highlight the elderly state of certain characters) it makes for an energetic and enthusiastic cast, perfect for tackling the unfamiliar, and great for persuading the audience that one does not necessarily need to know the music to enjoy the show.

The best way of getting to know the Grand Duke is to see a production; come along this week (Thursday 24th, Friday 25th and Saturday 26th February) to the Royal Grammar School Performance Centre in Jesmond, Newcastle and support the youth of the UK Gilbert and Sullivan scene!

Blog Jealousy

In discovering that several of my friends and relations persue the interesting hobby phenomenon known as 'blogging', it occured to me that I was suffering from an accute over-interest, motivated by mild blog jealousy. So here I am. Now, my only difficulty is that I have nothing of value to write...